Spooky Mulder

by The Chris Haverland

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released December 28, 2014

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The Chris Haverland Los Angeles, California

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Track Name: Drop Off
There's a guy at the top of a parking structure drinking beer with his friends sitting through a sex ed lecture being taught by the "fucking" best.
And he's looking over the edge again 'cause he really likes drop offs, and that's what he tells his friends. Maybe he sees some kind of portal at the bottom where the curb is. I think he feels strangely mortal on the top floor where the hurt is. always there. It's always there. I want to love you, but it's always there. I want you to love me too, but it's always there. I want to want to fuck you too. I wonder what I did to piss God off like that, so I can say sorry or something. I wonder what I did. I feel the hurt too much to make the scene it takes to get people to look out for me. I'm not a stable man. I can't play your stable games. I'm a dysfunctional man with a forgettable name.
Track Name: Little Window
You know how I get when I get lonely. Been talking to the devil recently. When I'm alone she calmly reminds me just how much she wants to sleep with me. I am torn between her bedsheets and with the floor indirectly beneath me. The girl in the back with the long black hair is doing kid friendly drugs again. Getting high off the way it feels to impress all her friends. I am reminded of how there is no god even listening. Just a girl in my room and god is what she's calling me. You've got everything you want, you should be happy. You know how I get when I get scary. My brother wants to have a talk with me. Been listening in on fighting sounds pressed to my door when no one else is around. I don't know how to tell him I'm leaving soon. Say it a lot, but God, do I love you. After a great deal of prayer, I was given one more chance. I remember my grandfather's blade, it's my window out of this place.
Track Name: No Name No 1
(by elliott smith)

At a party, he is waiting, looking kind of spooky and withdrawn, like he could be underwater. The muddy mother with her hundred arms swept all aside. I hate to walk behind other people's ambitions. I saw you waiting saintlike with your warning: Leave alone, you don't belong here. Got nervous, started whistling. Every thought a ricochet, did you notice? Well I wonder, what's the worst thing I can say? Froze up inside, you remind me of someones daughter. Every daughter. I forgot her name, a shame. Go home leave with your pain. And when I go, don't you follow. Slip out quiet nobody's looking.